What to Do When Your Self Image is Destroying Your Life!

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One of the BEST books on Self Esteem I’ve ever read is one written by Maxwell Maltz called Psycho-Cybernetics.

It’s been years since I’ve read this book but from it I’ve gleamed some valuable points that I never forgot.

Our Self Image, is how we think about ourself, a good dvd/book or really philosophy about our thoughts is “The Law of Attraction” and “The Secret” which has been pretty huge in the media recently on Oprah and Larry King, etc…

First according to the secret we become what we think about most, so if we think we’re ugly and fat then that is what we will become, however if we think about becoming better looking but we still end each thought with how bad we look now, then that negates the positive thinking – it’s all or nothing, you need to not only create a positive thought but re-inforce that thought w/ a strong positive emotion, even if it’s faked a little the more you do it the stronger will be the change on your subconscious level – NEVER underestimate your Subconscious mind.

Now for where I was originally headed – The one thing that I gleamed the most from Pshycho Cybernetics is something called C.R.A.F.T. it’s a method of changing your thought and behavioural problems.

C – Stands for Cancel. When you think of something negative,  like for instance you see a pretty body in a magazine and automatically say to your subconscious, I could never look like that. This is a negative thought that MUST be controlled, it must be tamed and beaten the crap out of.

To Cancel this thought and make it like it was never born you need to say the word “Cancel” say it loud, say it proud, say it with authority because this is the first step to taking control of your mind. But this is only the 1st step.

R – Replace, immediately after saying “Cancel”, you need to come up w/ a replacement thought – but it needs to be more than that, you need to think about how beautiful you are, and how happy your are with the way you are. Feel it, and own it.

A – Affirmation – each negative thought you have is a habit, it takes roughly 21-28 days to break a habit, and the only way to break a habit of thought is to re-inforce the positive thought give it more power.  To do this you need to create an affirmation. Following the model scenario in the magazine, your affirmation could be: “I have a warm and endearing smile, I am beautiful, and I love who I am, especially my uniqueness.”

Look this is SERIOUS. We are at War!

At any one time our thoughts are a waging a war, this is an enormous war our Positive thoughts, thoughts that are in accordinance with God, and with the universe, and everything right in this world, then there are the Negative thoughts, these are the Orcs, these will destroy you if you let them, they will completely destroy your mind. Don’t let them. Seize this day to change your life, the journey of a million miles starts with a mere footstep. I’m a huge Hobbit fan, and I love when Sam reaches the outskirts of Hobbiton, and takes that one last step away from home, the furthest step he’s ever taken, the step that would change his life forever.

The hobbits went through some enormous changes, emotionally, spiritually, physically, saving the world was demanding, the you hiding inside is a hobbit, a small halfling, trying to break free, and show to the world that you have what it takes that you are worthy.

*Back on Track*

F – Focus – this step is about creating a vision of who you desire to be. This is if where you change your behavior to go with your thoughts. Now that your habits of belief are changed you can focus on changing things if need be, if it’s all in your head and you don’t really need to change anything that’s fine too. Say for instance you want to lose weight though, here is where you’d write up a vision of who you want to be, then spend time each day meditating on the image, and how happy you are that you look and feel that way.

T – Training – Sometimes change requires learning, here is where you learn, it could be signing up for Ediets.com or enlisting w/ a life facilitator or personal trainer, it could be as simple as reading a few books, whatever it is – this step is important to finishing your transformation, it’s very important to always be reading a good book, learning how to be what you need to be.

One more idea before I end this – is a lot of time, self-loathing and low self esteem is paired with fear, fear of changing, fear of doing anything, fear of this or that it doesn’t matter, a lot of us and yes I was one of these people have fear and are overly anxious be it just social anxiety.

A huge way to get over this is to be dangerous and adventuresome, pick something that is exciting and fun, and something that is totally out of your spectrum – go hang gliding, or sky diving, or hold a tarantula, –pick one fear to overcome, and when you face that fear it will cascade down, the bigger the fear the better.. Think of a pyramid of Wine glasses. Each glass represents a fear, and the wine represents facing a fear, the bigger your fear is that you face the more wine cups fill up from the top one overflowing.

So it is w/ life… I hope some of this insight will help you…God bless you in your journey.

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About the Author

Patrick Curl is a professional Internet Marketer, Social Marketer, Seo Expert, Blogger, and Network Marketer. He loves to be his own boss, teach others to be self-wealthy, and get paid to do what he loves, which is blog. Follow him on Twitter! Also Checkout: Shop Dayton - to support local businesses in Dayton, OH. Social Media Strategy by Patrick Curl. Social Media MArketing of Orange County California - where I'm a consultant.